Why relationships, conversation and discussion are key to better parenting outcomes

For our very first Parent Programme blog post, we wanted to provide a specific insight into the role of a Parent Programme trainer. Both what this entails day-to-day, and why the existence of such a role is important. 

We’re really delighted to provide insight directly from a key figure actively working in Parent Programme training. John McLeod is one of the primary Togetherness trainers in Northern Ireland, and he has very kindly given us a look into some of the basics of his work.  You can read our interview below:  

Tell us a little bit about your role and what it entails?  

I am an RMN and Specialist Practitioner in child and adolescent mental health. I am also a licensed trainer for Togetherness (formerly the Solihull Approach). I retired from the HSC, and currently spend most of my time training others. This means providing parent programmes, and supporting, developing and promoting the Togetherness programme in Northern Ireland.  

Why do you think evidence-based parenting programmes are important?  

Evidence-based parent programmes (EBPP) are central to effectiveness and outcomes, particularly when you’re supporting and helping families cope with day-to-day challenges at home.  

The fact they’re evidence-based ensures delivery is backed by research and evaluations, making providers and families alike satisfied they are receiving the best programmes, that can make a real difference in daily life.  

Are there any moments that really stand out to you when you think about the work you’ve been doing? If nothing comes to mind, what would you like to see more of?  

For moments that really stand out, it’s always good to see parental reporting of positive changes that happen during the programme. For example, a reduction in conflict between parent and child, or an increased closeness in families. Usually by the third session we’re starting to see shifts in thinking and attitudes to children’s behaviour.  

The Togetherness Programme is specifically all about relationships, conversation, and discussion. Refreshingly, no presentations or videos are used which can distract from the core focus. Having dads attend too has also created fantastic discussions, insights and viewpoints that dramatically help with the process.  

Is there anything you would like to change in how we approach children’s mental health?  

A recent BBC research article raised the issue that children’s mental health difficulties may be related to a lack of resilience. Within one of the core areas of the Togetherness Parent Programme is the ‘dance of reciprocity’. This is an area that fascinates families and helps them begin to see how elements focused on this can help build children’s resilience. Therefore, this is an area I feel we need to specifically consider more, rather than focusing mainly on behavioural guidance.  

What do you think we’re currently doing well regarding infant and children’s mental health?  

The National Children’s Bureau focuses on infant mental health consistently and really looks into how suitable interventions can support better outcomes for families. Through lunchtime seminars, teaching sessions, and IMH e-bulletins, we can continue to further the awareness of infant mental health.  

Overall, by getting involved as early as possible to help families, we can have a dramatic impact further down the line. It is important to remain proactive in this area, keeping children and infant mental health at the top of the agenda.   

If you had unlimited money and influence, what changes would you love to see in the current parent programme system? 

I would love to improve access to parent programmes in communities, making them less stigmatising to attend, with consideration to what programme may fit best with families. I believe there is room for a variety of different programmes, and each has its own merits. We know the phrase ‘one size fits all’ is outdated. 

I would like for there to be an updated online access point which has a directory of EBPP for parents to look at and select parent programmes from, with the opportunity for families to have discussions to find which specific programme fits them best.   

I would also like there to be community based information sessions for families about parent programmes via schools, youth groups, and community centres.  

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