Honey from Honey’s Childcare, a childminder based in London, recounts how she worked to successfully increase the confidence and social skills of a shy quiet child through careful observation and sensitive interaction. Determined to make progress, and working with the child's parents, Honey encouraged her in activities she enjoyed and supported her in activities she found challenging.
(Also included as a case study for QIP 3)
Arriving to our setting at eight months old, E was a shy and quiet girl. She gave no eye contact when I would speak to her or interact in any way when I tried to play with her. It was heartbreaking not to receive any response from her when trying to engage in play. Her parents had noticed similar behaviours at home, but saw occasional moments of communication, which provided some relief.
Despite her lack of response, we decided to have her hearing tested to rule out any potential issues, thankfully with no concerns. Months passed with minimal progress, but I was determined to help E open up. I introduced various activities like treasure baskets, messy play and water play, hoping to elicit some reaction. She continued to show discomfort during handovers and remained silent once settled in. Interactions with unfamiliar adults also triggered her unease. I closely observed her dislikes to better understand her needs as she had shown little that made her feel at ease.
Adjusting our approach, I followed E's lead, focusing on building trust and allowing her time to adjust. Gradually, she showed signs of improvement, with less emotional handovers and quicker settling periods. I persisted in planning diverse activities, even incorporating another child to encourage interaction.
I reached out to the local Special Educational Needs and Disabilities Coordinator (SENDCo) for guidance and was reassured that while E's behaviour was not so common, in their experience ‘selective mutism’ was likely to improve over time.
Despite feeling a mix of emotions and a sense of letting her down, I was grateful for the parents' cooperation and trust. Together, we provided E with enriching experiences while being mindful of her triggers. Our outings posed challenges, but her growing trust in me made it easier to comfort her. Every small step forward, from slight finger movements to touching objects, marked progress in her development. I remained committed to her growth, celebrating each milestone as a significant achievement in her journey.
One-to-one activities were often planned for her to help her build self-confidence and self-esteem. One particular activity involved a mirror and various dressing-up items to encourage her independence and sense of achievement. The goal was to enhance her self-awareness and reflect on her own identity. This activity was a follow-up from the previous week's World Book Day event, where she showed a keen interest in playing dress-up, and I felt it was important to capture that and to build upon it.
When given a box of dressing-up items, E eagerly engaged. She picked an outfit and tried to put it on, showing determination and willingness to try new things.
However, looking in the mirror, E seemed to withdraw a bit, showing shyness. Reassurance and encouragement were important to help her feel at ease. Despite hesitancy, E eventually joined in the activity, interacting with friends.
The observation revealed that while E thrives in certain social settings, she may struggle with shyness or anxiety when the focus is solely on her. To support her in overcoming this challenge, as a next step I suggested to introduce recording devices for E to explore. This would not only help her become more comfortable with hearing her own voice but also boost her confidence in communicating with others.
By closely monitoring E’s progress and providing tailored support, the aim was to help her feel more confident and engaged in various social situations. Through consistent encouragement and opportunities for self-expression, E could continue to grow and develop her social skills in a positive and nurturing environment.
November 2024